Sporting Quotes of the week.

[Toon]

"What do you think?!"
Andrew Flintoff when asked if he was relieved at finally captaining England to victory over Australia.

"I'm gonna move here - I'll see what the house prices are like!"
New Zealand batsman Lou Vincent ponders moving to the Waca after hitting 76 against England - his latest impressive innings at the ground.

"Ricky Hatton ain't nothing but a fat man. I'm going to punch him in his beer belly when I see him."
Floyd Mayweather strikes a low blow.

"When I retire, I'll get Ricky Hatton to wash my clothes and cut my lawn and buckle my shoes."
Mayweather puts the boot in.

"You wouldn't argue with him. I think I'll leave it to my assistant, Nigel Pearson, to tell him if he's done something wrong!"
Newcastle boss Glenn Roeder on signing 6ft 4in beefcake Oguchi Onyewu.

"Mark Noble came into training with a proper red face. It turned out that he and George McCartney had gone to a tanning parlour and had a go on the sunbeds. George visits the salon regularly and knows how long to go on for but Nobes went on for a good 10 minutes longer, burning his head and eyes."
West Ham keeper on Mark Noble's solarium hell - not the only tanning the Hammers have got this season.

"It augurs well that there are so many good young English keepers. Not that I care, I'm Scottish."
Watford's Malky Mackay on team-mate Ben Foster.

"Managers make decisions that can bite you on the ****."
Hartlepool's Andy Monkhouse on scoring the winner against Swindon, weeks after Robins boss Paul Sturrock let him go.

The award has to go to Jose....

"It's like having a blanket that is too small for the bed. You pull the blanket up to keep your chest warm and your feet stick out. I cannot buy a bigger blanket because the supermarket is closed. But the blanket is made of cashmere!"
Jose Mourinho reflects on his injury 'crisis' - at least they kept a clean sheet on Saturday.