Funny Web Jokes

[Kim]

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[Herodesign]

[Lidon]

What do you call a dating service that only collects a fee when two people hit it off?




Pay per click.

[reefa]

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[Kelly]

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An engineer, a manager, and a programmer are riding in a car. They come to a hill and their brakes fail. After careening down the hill and finally coming to a stop they get out to decide what to do. The manager says “We need to have a meeting to form a committee to see what we should do next!” The engineer says, “Screw that! Give me a pocket knife and some duck tape and I’ll have us going in no time!” The programmer looks at them both and says, “Lets push it back to the top and see if it does it again.”


An int, a char and a string walk into a bar and order some drinks. A short while later, the int and char start hitting on the waitress who gets very uncomfortable and walks away. The string walks up to the waitress and says “You’ll have to forgive them, they’re primitive types.”


A programmer’s wife sends him to the grocery store with the instructions, “get a loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.” He comes home with a dozen loaf of bread and tells her, “they had eggs.”


A programmer goes out with a chick. Next day he tells his friend how the date went: “It was raining, we were soaked. We went to her place where she started to undress before me… Then she threw the wet clothes on the computer” – “Wow… what kind of computer?” – the other says.