Coat check girl: Last night Michael came in my eye and it was all puffy and red.
Stripper: Why did he do that?
Coat check: He said he didn't mean it. Usually he goes for my nostrils or my ear. We couldn't go out for dinner for two hours until it died down.
Stripper: Wow.
--Strip Club
Little boy to mother: Mom, have you ever heard of Anne Frank?
(silence)
Little boy: You know, she was this holocaust victim who lived in an attic and wrote this diary?
(pause)
Mother: I mean, I've read about the holocaust, but I don't know any specific authors.
--Smith & Sackett, Carroll Gardens
Little boy looking at photos being sold on street: Why do they call it Gay Street?
Dad: They got all kinds of ****** up names for streets in this city.
--Times Square
Not-so-chubby girl: Dude, I'm so fat.
Ordinary girl: No you're not. You just got a little belly.
Not-so-chubby girl: Yeah...I wish I had fat magnets so I could put them in my bra. It would suck up all my fat and make me go up a cup size.
Ordinary girl: Wow. And I always thought plastic surgery was the only option.
--NYU
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