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Old 09-06-2008, 08:40 AM
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James Jones James Jones is offline
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Passing tourist: What are you guys waiting for?
Tourist in line: We don't know, but we thought it might be fun.
Passing tourist: Okay! [Gets in line].

--Greene & Grand


Young woman #1: I don't want to apply too many times though, because I don't want to look desperate.
Young woman #2: Oh, how many times have you applied?
Young woman #1: None.

--Diner, 48th & Lexington


Sad, sober friend: I just really miss her, I guess.
Drunk friend: There's no color the sky can't be at any given time. Remember that!

--E 11th & 2nd


Lesbian daughter: Wow, I have such burnt-out memory cells. Not to be confused with my sickle cell.
Sister, laughing: It's all mom's fault! All mom's fault.
Lesbian to mom, screaming and laughing: Why didn't you eat my placenta?! You should've eaten my placenta! You needed to eat my placenta!
Mom, calm as can be: I'm not African. And besides, you have enough people eating your placenta.

--Parking Lot, NYU College


[Class is conjugating Japanese verbs in the "to make someone or let someone" form.]
Student #1: To make someone eat.
Student #2: To make someone sit.
Student #3: To make someone forget. [Beat, then in English.] Wait, how can you make someone forget something?
Japanese teacher, totally serious: Bourne Identity.

--Japanese Class, Columbia University


Overloud teenager #1: You know what I figured out? All this shit we're listening to now... When we're older that shit's gonna be old school.
Overloud teenager #2: Huh?
Overloud teenager #1: That Fitty track. When we're... older and shit, it's gonna be old school. Shit's gonna be old school.
Overloud teenager #2: I don't get it.

--Uptown 1 Train
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